"CPR dummy looked like him and had clearly been stabbed. Repeatedly. In the groin. He thought she might have used the dummy for target practice, and tried not to be offended. Key word: tried."

Satire, Absurdity, Violence, Comedy, Irony

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"CPR dummy looked like him and had clearly been stabbed. Repeatedly. In the groin. He thought she might have used the dummy for target practice, and tried not to be offended. Key word: tried."

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"Genuinity is mother of stupidity."

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"A fishing-rod was a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other."

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"You cut life to pieces with your epigrams."

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"This nation is like all the others that have been spewed upon the earth - ready to shout for any cause that will tickle its vanity or fill its pocket. What a hell of a heaven it will be when they get all these hypocrites assembled there!"

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"Scandal is gossip made tedious by morality."

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"Silena appeared out of the woods, her sword drawn. Her Aphrodite armour was pink and red, colour coordinated to match her clothes and makeup. She looked like Guerilla Warfare Barbie."

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"The god's chosen beverage. Tremble before the horror of Diet Coke!"

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"I understand we'll be attending your friend Miss Worthington's Christmas ball. Perhaps I'll find a suitable-- which is to say wealthy-- wife among the ladies attending."And perhaps they will run screaming for the convent."

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Explore more quotes by Gena Showalter

"We're gonna lie when the truth is hard? That's how this relationship is going to work? All righty, then."

Honesty, Relationship, Truth, Conflict

"He's a love-'em-and-leave-'em kind of guy. And though he's not a Lord, he does have a curse hanging over his head. I have the book to prove it.William growled low in his throat. "Anya! Must you share my secrets with everyone? He flattened his palms on the arms of his chair. "Fine. If you can spill, I can, too. Anya's the reason the Titanic sank. She was playing chicken with the icebergs.Scowling, Anya anchored her hands on her hips. "William had a bronze made of his penis and placed it on his mantel."

Comedy, Humor, Absurdity, Secrets, Satire

"That means life itself is a fairy tale. Like the characters, we all live and love and search for a happily-ever-after."

Fantasy, Life, Hope, Love, Meaning

"Yeah, okay. You're right. I was having dinner with Zombie Carl the other night. You know, steak, rare, and a bottle of vintage type A. He told me all his secrets, but too bad for you I promised him I wouldn't tell. In exchange I asked him to gather his best undead buddies and stalk me through my friend's yard. And oh, yeah, it was totally fine if they wanted to use me as an all-night-dinner buffet, because having organs is SO last year."

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"It was common knowledge that big, bad city boys spent the bulk of their time sleeping around, coiffing their hair and posting pictures of food on the internet."

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"She wasn't easy to be around at the best of times, and during the worst, well, she sucked flaming balls of mean...Still she wanted his eternal admiration."

Relationship, Desire, Conflict, Admiration, Ego

"The on and off thing is kind of annoying, isn't it? First with Cole, now with Gavin. "Maybe you need a tune up." I rolled my eyes. "I'll just pop into the supernatural ability repair shop sometime tomorrow." He grinned, his fingers tracing the line of my jaw."

Relationship, Frustration, Humor, Supernatural

"You try almost dying, being chased, thenhopping in a car with a complete (horny)stranger."

Risk, Danger, Survival, Chaos

"There are two kinds of people,' she'd said. 'Those who coast through life like ducks in a row, following one after the other, and those who ride the waves.' Tears spilled down my cheeks, and my voice cracked. "'Ride the waves, baby, and live. Live."

Adventure, Choice, Courage, Life

"Need a triumph, his demon whined.I'll get you one. Promise.Sure?What are you, Doubt? Yeah, I'm sure."

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