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"Coughing in the theater is not a respiratory ailment. It is a criticism."
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"They were the sort who berated a man for meddling and chased him away, then berated him again for not being there when he was needed. Not that they would admit he was needed, even then, not them. Raise a hand to help and you were interfering, do nothing and you were an un-trustworthy wastrel."

"The making of miracles to edification was as ardently admired by pious Victorians as it was sternly discouraged by Jesus of Nazareth. Not that the Victorians were unique in this respect. Modern writers also indulge in edifying miracles though they generally prefer to use them to procure unhappy endings, by which piece of thaumaturgy they win the title of realists."

"He was one of the numerous and varied legion of dullards, of half-animated abortions, conceited, half-educated coxcombs, who attach themselves to the idea most in fashion only to vulgarize it and who caricature every cause they serve, however sincerely."

"Is Wagner a human being at all? Is he not rather a disease? He contaminates everything he touches - he has made music sick."

"Ol, ol you have learnt something new, didn't you??So you are saying it again and again with smile like we are an idiots, but my question is did you understand it? Do you know what did you said, so you big peace of shit say something more to impress us, because this doesn't impress us."

"Criticism always produces negative reactions, but appreciation always creates positive actions."
Explore more quotes by Alan Jay Lerner

"It's not a pretty face, I grant you. But underneath its flabby exterior is an enormous lack of character."

"Back home everyone said I didn't have any talent. They might be saying the same thing here but it sounds better in French."
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