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"In order to be a top-tier candidate, I need 7.5 million dollars, and I currently have 0.0 million dollars."
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Exlpore more Order quotes
"I wanted to make the violence beautiful in order to heighten our revulsion."
"I thought if I followed the rules, things would turn out all right. that's the thing about the cure, isn't it? It isn't just about deliria at all. It's about order. A path for everyone. You just have to follow it and everything will be okay. That's what the DFA is about. That's what I belevied in-what I've had to believe in. Because otherwise, it's just...chaos."
"Nothing Functions Normally Apart From The Principles Of The Kingdom Of God."
"Order is what exists before you start arranging things."
"Let me tell you something that we Israelis have against Moses. He took us 40 years through the desert in order to bring us to the one spot in the Middle East that has no oil!"
"In order to be a diplomat, one must speak a number of languages, including doubletalk."
"It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy."
"If they had told me I was the janitor and would have to mop up and clean the toilets after the show in order to play, I probably would have done it."
Explore more quotes by Stephen Colbert
"Truthiness is tearing apart our country, and I don't mean the argument over who came up with the word. I don't know whether it's a new thing, but it's certainly a current thing, in that it doesn't seem to matter what facts are. It used to be, everyone was entitled to their own opinion, but not their own facts. But that's not the case anymore. Facts matter not at all. Perception is everything."
"I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked, she got famous for breaking the law."
"I used to write things for friends. There was this girl I had a crush on, and she had a teacher she didn't like at school. I had a real crush on her, so almost every day I would write her a little short story where she would kill him in a different way."
"You shouldn't listen to us at all if you're looking for information. We don't take ourselves seriously on any level; we're just comedians."
"In order to maintain an untenable position, you have to be actively ignorant. One motto on the show is, 'Keep your facts, I'm going with the truth.'"
"In order to be a top-tier candidate, I need 7.5 million dollars, and I currently have 0.0 million dollars."
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