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Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Playing Solitaire is a non-smoking employee's smoke break."

"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee."

"I say let the world go to hell, but I should always have my tea."
Explore more quotes by Stephen Leacock


"Now, the essence, the very spirit of Christmas is that we first make believe a thing is so, and lo, it presently turns out to be so."


"If every day in the life of a school could be the last day but one, there would be little fault to find with it."


"It's called political economy because it is has nothing to do with either politics or economy."


"What we call creative work, ought not to be called work at all, because it isn't. I imagine that Thomas Edison never did a day's work in his last fifty years."


"The classics are only primitive literature. They belong to the same class as primitive machinery and primitive music and primitive medicine."


"There are two things in ordinary conversation which ordinary people dislike - information and wit."


"Writing is no trouble: you just jot down ideas as they occur to you. The jotting is simplicity itself - it is the occurring which is difficult."


"We think of the noble object for which the professor appears tonight, we may be assured that the Lord will forgive any one who will laugh at the professor."


"Electricity is of two kinds, positive and negative. The difference is, I presume, that one comes a little more expensive, but is more durable; the other is a cheaper thing, but the moths get into it."
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