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"It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth."
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"I have no trouble with the twelve inches between my elbow and my palm. It's the seven inches between my ears that's bent."
"I used to have trouble in front of an audience. I felt uncomfortable."
"I'm trying to get hold of them... the trouble is a lot of the companies that recorded and produced the albums went bust, so I don't know where to get the masters."
"Had Roosevelt been caught, we would have been in a lot of trouble. It would have been very embarrassing."
"I have trouble writing if I can't picture how things are going to look."
Explore more quotes by George Burns
"It's hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty."
"Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair."
"Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that's down can come up."
"If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it."
"I don't believe in dying. It's been done. I'm working on a new exit. Besides, I can't die now - I'm booked."
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