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"Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery."
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"Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time."
Author Name
Personal Development
"If you are a writer you locate yourself behind a wall of silence and no matter what you are doing, driving a car or walking or doing housework you can still be writing, because you have that space."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Freedom is not an ideal, it is not even a protection, if it means nothing more than freedom to stagnate, to live without dreams, to have no greater aim than a second car and another television set."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The New Dealers have all left Washington to make way for the car dealers."
Author Name
Personal Development
"America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable."
Author Name
Personal Development
"We have an uncanny ability to make birds do what we want them to do. In Blood Simple there's a shot from the bumper of a car and it's going up this road and a huge flock of birds takes off at the perfect moment."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The idea that maybe you don't have to own a car if you only need one occasionally may catch on, just like time-sharing caught on in real estate."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Everybody has a gun in their car in Detroit."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Now I'm having to live with sales of around 50,000 per album - but I'm pretty content with my place in the general scheme of things, even if it's meant I don't drive a fancy car and can't afford grand vacations."
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Personal Development
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"There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt."
Humor
"When humor goes, there goes civilization."
Humor
"Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time."
Car
"Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial."
Family
"Once you get a spice in your home, you have it forever. Women never throw out spices. The Egyptians were buried with their spices. I know which one I'm taking with me when I go."
Woman
"Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown."
Woman
"It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding."
Family
"I was terrible at straight items. When I wrote obituaries, my mother said the only thing I ever got them to do was die in alphabetical order."
Family
"Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving."
Emotional
"Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you."
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