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Groucho Marx

"Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know."

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"Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know."

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"Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding."

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"History develops, art stands still."

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"To catch a husband is an art; to hold him is a job."

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"You do not need a boyfriend or a girlfriend to write an emotional poet, because poetry is beyond hooks and holes."

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"The basis of art is truth, both in matter and in mode."

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"Music heals all forms of misery."

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"Modernity is the transient, the fleeting, the contingent; it is one half of art, the other being the eternal and the immovable."

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"The play was a great success, but audience was a dismal failure."

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Amber Hurdle

"The man can neither make, nor retain, one moment of time; it all comes to him by pure gift; he might as well regard the sun and moon as his chattels."

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Amber Hurdle

"The business of art lies just in this, -- to make that understood and felt which, in the form of an argument, might be incomprehensible and inaccessible."

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Groucho Marx
"I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up."
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"I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it."
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"I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course."
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"All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats."
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"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury."
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"Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot."
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"Why should I care about posterity? What's posterity ever done for me?"
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"It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy."
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"I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every Monday from 7:30 to 8. to educate America. They couldn't educate America if they started at 6:30."
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"A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke."
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