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Fred Allen

"The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has been exposed to conference."

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"The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has been exposed to conference."

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Asa Don Brown

"I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second."

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"Advertising is legalized lying."

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"Advertising is the rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket."

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Asa Don Brown

"Expensive advertising courts us with hints and images. The ordinary kind merely says, Buy."

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Asa Don Brown

"Advertising treats all products with the reverence and the seriousness due to sacraments."

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Asa Don Brown

"There is no such thing as a good or bad ad in isolation. What is good at one moment is bad at another. Research can trap you into the past."

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Asa Don Brown

"Nobody's profitable at this moment, because recession is on; advertising dollars are down, and expenses are way up. So that kind of belies the situation that you would expect, because the ratings are way up everywhere."

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Asa Don Brown

"The first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise... and cultivate the delightfully vague."

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Asa Don Brown

"News represents another form of advertising, not liberal propaganda."

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Asa Don Brown

"The network and local TV angle of broadcast television has received a black eye for not properly debating within the news issues that should be debated, instead of shuffling them of to television advertising."

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Fred Allen
"An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is about to look into a gas tank with a lighted match."
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Fred Allen
"The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion."
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Fred Allen
"An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission."
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Fred Allen
"You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart."
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Fred Allen
"Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners."
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Fred Allen
"Television is a device that permits people who haven't anything to do to watch people who can't do anything."
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Fred Allen
"All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it."
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Fred Allen
"Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent."
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Fred Allen
"Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted."
Man,
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Fred Allen
"An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt."
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