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"America is the country where you can buy a lifetime supply of aspirin For one dollar and use it up in two weeks."
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"I think I came back from America a funnier and nicer person than I went."
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Personal Development
"We've performed in South America and in Japan."
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Personal Development
"Haldeman is the only man in America in this generation who let his hair grow for a courtroom appearance."
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Personal Development
"If all our comrades of Europe, America and other countries, who do not understand what we are doing to Spanish Anarchism, would come to Spain, we could then see how they would react."
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Personal Development
"When I came to America in the '60s, it was the place to be. I wonder if I'd come here today."
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Personal Development
"America is becoming so educated that ignorance will be a novelty. I will belong to the select few."
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Personal Development
"This nation can no longer tolerate the autonomous conduct of any single service. A waste of the resources of America in spendthrift defense is an invitation to disaster for America."
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Personal Development
"Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected."
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Personal Development
"The innovative spirit was America's strongest attribute, transforming everything into a brave new world, but there lingered an insecurity about the arts."
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Personal Development
"No secular state ever existed and none would exist until the end of the French Revolution, and so we understand that America was built on the Judeo-Christian ethic and we believe that this nominee is going to see to it that those truths are upheld."
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"Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble."
Time
"Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?"
Money
"America is the country where you can buy a lifetime supply of aspirin For one dollar and use it up in two weeks."
America
"Love is the delightful interval between meeting a beautiful girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock."
Love
"My wife is the kind of girl who will not go anywhere without her mother, and her mother will go anywhere."
Mother
"Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open."
Happiness
"In Genesis, it says that it is not good for a man to be alone; but sometimes it is a great relief."
Man
"I would like to find a stew that will give me heartburn immediately, instead of at three o clock in the morning."
Will
"The trouble with life is that there are so many beautiful women and so little time."
Life
"I've read some of your modern free verse and wonder who set it free."
Wonder
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