"The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer."

Humor, Law, Complexity, Understanding, Knowledge

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"The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"I've accepted the fact I have mental illness but when my imaginary friends start calling me crazy that's where I draw the line."

Stanley Victor Paskavich, American Politician

Humor, Mental, Friend, Imagination

"Got a lot of sinful idears--but they seem kinda sensible."

John Steinbeck, American Author

Humor, Sin, Idea, Truth

"Laughter comes later, like wisdom teeth. And laughter at yourself comes last of all in a mad race with death. And sometimes, it isn't in time."

John Steinbeck, American Author

Humor, Laughter, Wisdom, Mortality

"Never stay up on the barren heights of cleverness, but come down into the green valleys of silliness."

Ludwig Wittgenstein, Austrian Philosopher

Humor, Cleverness

"I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing."

Jonathan Swift, Irish Writer

Humor, First, Fool, Kissing, Wonder

"If they gave him an enema, he could be buried in a matchbox."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Death, Sarcasm, Mortality

"Name the greatest of all inventors: Accident."

Mark Twain, American Author

Humor, Accident, Creativity, Surprise

"Pessimist - one who when he has the choice of two evils chooses both."

Oscar Wilde, Irish Dramatist

Humor, Pessimism, Evil, Choice, Irony

"Pardon my French if you're a religious man.''I am,' Bill said, grinning.'Then get outta my cab and go to fucking church,' the cabbie said, and they both burst out laughing."

Stephen King, American Author

Humor, Faith, Truth, Wisdom

"Mr. Bennet, how can you abuse your own children in such a way? Youtake delight in vexing me. You have no compassion for my poor nerves.""You mistake me, my dear. I have a high respect for your nerves. Theyare my old friends. I have heard you mention them with considerationthese last twenty years at least."

Jane Austen, British Writer

Humor, Marriage, Family, Nerves

Explore more quotes by Will Rogers

"Get someone else to blow your horn and the sound will carry twice as far."

Sound

"We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business?"

Business

"Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week."

War

"If you want to be successful, it's just this simple. Know what you are doing. Love what you are doing. And believe in what you are doing."

Love

"So let's be honest with ourselves and not take ourselves too serious, and never condemn the other fellow for doing what we are doing every day, only in a different way."

Day

"Chaotic action is preferable to orderly inaction."

Action

"I read about eight newspapers in a day. When I'm in a town with only one newspaper, I read it eight times."

Day

"One-third of the people in the United States promote, while the other two-thirds provide."

People

"It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts."

Man

"Do the best you can, and don't take life too serious."

Life