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"I love to go down to the schoolyard and watch all the little children jump up and down and run around yelling and screaming. They don't know I'm only using blanks."
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"Love nature as if it is your own garden of love."
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Personal Development
"Nourish yourself with the water of love to grow flowers of happiness in the garden of your heart."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Love has power in it; it can melt any heart, if your love is true and divine."
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Personal Development
"Be brave. Be kind. Be simple. Above all, be crazy with love."
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Personal Development
"The human race should learn from dogs about the enormous power of love."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Love is the ultimate power. Never forget to use it to win over your enemies."
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Personal Development
"Be the God or goddess of love and love everyone."
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Personal Development
"A touch of love makes everything better."
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Personal Development
"When someone tries to make you happy, that is a true sign of love."
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Personal Development
"Love is all we need."
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Personal Development
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"England is better only because I stand out there as 'unusual'."
England
"I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator."
Night
"Probably the worst time in a person's life is when they have to kill a family member because they are the devil. But otherwise it's been a pretty good day."
Family
"I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky, but there wasn't any gum under any of them."
Night
"At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote."
First
"My mother was like a sister to me, only we didn't have sex quite so often."
Sex
"When I wake up in the morning, I just can't get started until I've had that first, piping hot pot of coffee. Oh, I've tried other enemas."
Coffee
"I love to go down to the schoolyard and watch all the little children jump up and down and run around yelling and screaming. They don't know I'm only using blanks."
Love
"My computer beat me at checkers, but I sure beat it at kickboxing."
Computer
"I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well.""
Time
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