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"I got everybody on my side through comedy."
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"Make it dark, make it grim, make it tough, but then, for the love of God, tell a joke."
"Uh-oh, I hope he doesn't start rattling off dirty limericks next; she'll probably burn the hotel down."
"Are you out of your goddamn mind? You think we can take on two hundred soldiers? I know I am an extremely attractive man, J, but I am not Bruce Lee."Who's Bruce Lee?"Who's Bruce Lee? Kenji asks, horrified. "Oh my God. We can't even be friends anymore."Why? Was he a friend of yours?"You know what, he says, "just stop. Just-I can't even talk to you right now."
"I had to stop myself from laughing. Who needs help taking a pill?"
"Stand-up comedy and poverty. Those were my two main endeavors."
"Sometimes Spiro missed the times when a troublesome worker was thrown out of a high window and that was the end of him. These days, if you threw someone out of a window, they'd phone their lawyer on the way down."
Explore more quotes by Ruth Buzzi
"Life has all sorts of hills and valleys, and sometimes you don't end up doing what you had your heart set out on, but sometimes that's even better!"
"My nephews all look at me differently now. Before, they couldn't relate to me, and now I'm like a god."
"I really learned the power of the tube on Sesame Street and how it can influence a very young mind."
"Some of those STINKIN' press people just had to make fun of my decision in joining the show. They also made fun of other choices in my life that I was proud of then and still am now!!!"
"Around 7 years old, we girls took dancing lessons, joined the Brownies, the Girl Scouts, the 4H Club."
"I really enjoyed doing the voice of Nose Marie on the cartoon series Pound Puppies. Fun, FUN cast."
"I created the characters from what I read in the script. I decided how I should talk, accent, no accent, my own voice, or a created voice. Then, I visualize what I should look like."
"The original Dean Martin Comedy Hour handed me some hysterical sketches. I've got highlights on tons of these variety shows, given to me by their great writers. I'd love to be doing all that again."
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