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"The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it."
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"Patriotism is the narcissism of countries."
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Personal Development
"Extreme positions are not succeeded by moderate ones, but by contrary extreme positions."
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Personal Development
"Some people had attack dogs. Ghastek had attack lawyers."
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Personal Development
"All authority belongs to the people."
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Personal Development
"A reactionary is a somnambulist walking backwards."
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Personal Development
"I seldom think of politics more than eighteen hours a day."
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Personal Development
"An empty stomach is not a good political adviser."
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Personal Development
"It is easy for those who conflate religion with government to interpret any criticism of government or policy as an 'attack' on their 'faith'."
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Personal Development
"Speech is an arrangement of notes that will never be played again."
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Personal Development
"There is this common notion that young conservatives are the few, that most people had liberal worldviews when they were young. If this is true, then it is with great irony that a number of old liberals must never had progressed into conservatives as they grew older."
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"In our brief national history we have shot four of our presidents, worried five of them to death, impeached one and hounded another out of office. And when all else fails, we hold an election and assassinate their character."
History
"A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat."
Life
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible."
Woman
"There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences."
Consequence
"Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it."
Will
"Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys."
Car
"Fiscal conservatism is just an easy way to express something that is a bit more difficult, which is that the size and scope of government, and really the size and scope of politics in our lives, has grown uncomfortable, unwieldy, intrusive and inefficient."
Politics
"The average IQ in America is-and this can be proven mathematically-average."
Intelligence
"Never fight an inanimate object."
Fight
"When you pay a hospital bill, you're really paying two hospital bills - one bill for you because you have a job and/or insurance and can pay the hospital. and another bill, which is tacked onto your bill, to cover the medical expenses of someone who doesn't have a job and/or insurance and can't pay the hospital."
Society
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