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"We will then hear from the founder of the Mayo Clinic . . . Dr. Ted Clinic."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates... When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, 'Do I know you?"
Author Name
Personal Development
"Flowers are evil, because they live just to die for the love of other people. You don't believe me? Try it for yourself and see if you'll be good afterwards. Undeath is a way of life, for some things. That doesn't make it good or anything. Especially anything. Nothing makes anything anything. Because nothing is a serious matter, and anything just is."
Author Name
Personal Development
"This is wonderful, wonderful! Be the bird. You are the bird. Sacrifice yourself to abandoned family values...."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Dangerous as a lightning strike, as lethal as a pair of crisscrossing short swords, William whispered, "You're about to find out how your liver tastes, my friend."I have tasted it already, Zacharel said, his voice its usual monotone. The snowflakes began to fall in earnest, tiny at first, but growing in diameter. An arctic wind blustered around him. "It was a bit salty.How the hell was a guy supposed to respond to that?Apparently William didn't know, either, because he gaped at the angel. Then, "Maybe if you added a little pepper?O-kay. It was official. William had an answer for everything."
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Personal Development
"I've been a little cranky since that house fell on my sister."
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Personal Development
"Sharks to not eat Chinese people because they get hungry thirty minutes later."
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Personal Development
"It's okay to be absurd, ridiculous, and downright irrational at times; silliness is sweet syrup that helps us swallow the bitter pills of life."
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Personal Development
"Only by living absurdly is it possible to break out of this infinite absurdity."
Author Name
Personal Development
"To be sure, this is what generally happens when one eats cake; but Alice had got so much into the way of expecting nothing but out-of-the-way things to happen, that it seemed quite dull and stupid for life to go on in the common way."
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Personal Development
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"Their dad was the god of thieves, but they were about a stealthy as water buffalos."
Family
"When in doubt," Calypso said, "Tater Tots."
Comfort
"Piper: it looks like we have hole. Percy: Yeah we've got a dam hole! (LOL-ing) Piper: What! Percy: Inside joke. (still LOL-ing) Piper: Whatever."
Friendship
"It wasn't easy looking dignified wearing a bed sheet and a purple cape."
Humor
"Where his eyes should've been, there was only fire, empty sockets glowing with miniature nuclear explosions."
Horror
"And you, Percy, are my favorite son."
Family
"Lord Bacchus, do you remember me? I helped you with that missing leopard in Sonoma." Bacchus scratched his stubbly chin. "Ah... yes. John Green." "Jason Grace.""Whatever," the god said."
Recognition
"You'd think getting chopped into a million pieces and cast into the darkest part of the Underworld would give him a subtle clue that nobody wanted him around."
Danger
"Please!' That word didn't make sense to Nico. The Underworld had no mercy. It only had justice. 'You're already dead,' Nico said. 'You're a ghost with no tongue, no memory. You won't be sharing any secrets."
Justice
"He slung off his backpack. He'd managed to grab a lot of supplies at the Napa Bargain Mart: a portable GPS, duct tape, lighter, superglue, water bottle, camping roll, a Comfy Panda Pillow Pet (as seen on TV), and a Swiss army knife-pretty much every tool a modern demigod could want."
Survival
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