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Erma Bombeck

"In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced in television."

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"In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced in television."

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Asa Don Brown

"Father, I know you will hear me, I will speak."

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"We come into the world through a man and a woman. But life blessings us with many fathers and mothers."

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"A new baby is a bundle of hope, a smiling imagination, and a dancing dreams."

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Asa Don Brown

"The real beauty of a house is always the happiness inside that house!"

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"A philanderer cannot be a parent - a parent cannot be a philanderer."

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"We grow up opposing our parents only to become like them enough to oppose our children who behave as we once did-a reminder of how dreadful we were toward those now vindicated grandparents. And you thought God had no sense of humor."

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Asa Don Brown

"A healthy world is made of healthy nations. A healthy nation is made of healthy families. And a healthy family can only be raised on the foundation of a monogamous relationship."

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Asa Don Brown

"Grandchildren are their grandparents' toys."

Explore more quotes by Erma Bombeck

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Erma Bombeck
"A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend - and he's a priest."
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Erma Bombeck
"My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?"
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Erma Bombeck
"How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?"
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Erma Bombeck
"I was too old for a paper route, too young for Social Security and too tired for an affair."
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Erma Bombeck
"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'."
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Erma Bombeck
"For years my wedding ring has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my husband numerous times at parties that it's time to go home. It has been a source of relief to a dinner companion. It has been a status symbol in the maternity ward."
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Erma Bombeck
"A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat."
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Erma Bombeck
"In two decades I've lost a total of 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet."
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Erma Bombeck
"Children make your life important."
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Erma Bombeck
"Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other."
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