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"I mean, I've had bartenders and waiters and waitresses make a comment about a joke of mine, like pointing out some sort of logic error or something that I've never even thought about, and they're right."
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"I was trying to take the band in a direction that I thought was appropriate, and Roth was trying to take the band in more of a Las Vegas direction. And there he is."
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Personal Development
"Was it only by dreaming or writing that I could find out what I thought?"
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Personal Development
"While I do not suggest that humanity will ever be able to dispense with its martyrs, I cannot avoid the suspicion that with a little more thought and a little less belief their number may be substantially reduced."
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Personal Development
"I thought people would ask me really personal questions because I've shown more of myself, but it's a comedy, and people understand that it's a game we play."
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Personal Development
"My opinion is that a poet should express the emotion of all the ages and the thought of his own."
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Personal Development
"When I was young, I was too slow. I thought I must learn to run fast by practicing to run fast, so I ran 100 meters fast 20 times. Then I came back, slow, slow, slow."
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Personal Development
"All action results from thought, so it is thoughts that matter."
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Personal Development
"The omnipotence of evil has never resulted in anything but fruitless efforts. Our thoughts always escape from whoever tries to smother them."
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Personal Development
"Each "way of thinking" has its own shape and color, which wax and wane like the moon."
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Personal Development
"I thought I might say something to newsmen that could be turned into a scandal."
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"My sister sometimes does a Todd Barry tribute act."
Sister
"I don't know any astronauts. There are a lot of people who say they want to be comedians."
People
"I love chicken. I would eat chicken fingers on Thanksgiving if it were socially acceptable."
Love
"I mean, I guess I realized subconsciously that this is what I should be doing before I realized it, consciously. Verbally, I don't think I had committed to it, even though I was driving everywhere, every night, just trying to get on stage."
Driving
"If I'm at a party and someone puts on a Blues Brothers tape, I tend to go nuts."
Brother
"I must have done everything I had. You go through years where you go through everything you've ever written."
Years
"I'm traveling the world, ripping rooms apart with my stupendous comedy."
Comedy
"I had some friends that tried it down there, and I went to a couple of open mics, and I just kind of got this... this sick urge to try it instead of just watching it."
Friendship
"I mean, I guess I started during the comedy boom, so it was literally like, on Sunday you could decide you wanted to be a comic, and on Monday, you could be on stage."
Comedy
"People don't understand that that's really what it is. They're looking for a magic phone number or something. And to a certain extent, I understand that, because comedy is treated so much as a stepping stone by a lot of people."
People
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