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David Letterman

"New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom you shouldn't make a sudden move."

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"New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom you shouldn't make a sudden move."

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"I read some, and then visited with people involved in this curious, exciting and somewhat misunderstood sub-culture. I met with a fang maker, who offered to fit me for an exquisite pair."

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"A lot of compelling stories in the world aren't being told, and the fact that people don't know about them compounds the suffering."

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"I can laugh on cue, and it sounds real. People laugh with me."

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"There is always something infinitely mean about other people's tragedies."

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"I'm not an activist per se, but I have strong feelings about things. People can jump on celebrities for being ill-informed or naive, but I've got a right to say what I believe."

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"I am attracted to people who make this effort in knowing what suits them - they are individual and stylish."

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"People used to complain that selling a president was like selling a bar of soap. But when you buy soap, at least you get the soap. In this campaign you just get two guys telling you they really value cleanliness."

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"I'm not a slave to objectivity. I'm never quite sure what it means. And it means different things to different people."

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"Forty years ago this country went down a rabbit hole in Vietnam and millions died. I fear we're going down a rabbit hole once again - and if people can stop and think and reflect on some of the ideas and issues in this movie, perhaps I've done some damn good here!"

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"Dick Cheney said he was running again. He said his health was fine, 'I've got a doctor with me 24 hours a day.' Yeah, that's always the sign of a man in good health, isn't it?"
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"Yesterday Senator John Kerry changed his mind and now supports the ban on gay marriages. I'm telling you this guy has more positions than Paris Hilton."
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"Next in importance to having a good aim is to recognize when to pull the trigger."
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"I had no idea this thing was televised. Boy, is my face red."
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"Here's a little known fact - Arnold is the first body builder to run for governor since Janet Reno."
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"There is no off position on the genius switch."
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"President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does this guy wind?"
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"Don't forget it's daylight savings time. You spring forward, then you fall back. It's like Robert Downey Jr. getting out of bed."
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"New York... when civilization falls apart, remember, we were way ahead of you."
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