"The Bible and several other self help or enlightenment books cite the Seven Deadly Sins. They are: pride, greed, lust, envy, wrath, sloth, and gluttony. That pretty much covers everything that we do, that is sinful... or fun for that matter."

"I like jazz, but I could never play it. You just sit there with a guitar the size of a Chevy on your chest, wearing a stupid hat, playing the same solo for an hour."

"It's not how big your pencil is; it's how you write your name."

"If you guys are going to be throwing beer bottles at us, at least make sure they're full."

"Next thing you know they'll take your thoughts away."