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"Heaven. The biggest waste of our time we ever invented, outside jigsaws."
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"No matter how kind you are, always expect a few imbeciles."

"When young people are cynical, and snarky, they shoot down their own future. When you keep saying "No," all that's left is what other people said "Yes" to before you were born. Really, "No" is no choice at all."

"Most cynics are really crushed romantics: they've been hurt, they're sensitive, and their cynicism is a shell that's protecting this tiny, dear part in them that's still alive."

"The only activity a cynic will find contagious is yawning, that is, with other people, at other people."

"I think a lot of cynicism has dropped away from my shoulders since I stopped drinking."

"People, generally, suck."

"In bridge clubs and in councils of state, the passions are the same."

"It is good to be a cynic - it is better to be a contented cat - and it is best not to exist at all."

"Motivating people, forcing them to your will, gives you a cynical attitude toward humanity. It degrades everything it touches."

"It is through experience that I have lost faith in USA law enforcement."
Explore more quotes by Caitlin Moran

"Not one had ever passed judgement on my cheap handbag to my face. But then, this is a reserved country."

"When a woman walks into a room, her outfit is the first thing she says, before she even opens her mouth. Women are judged on what they wear in a way men would find incomprehensible."

"Lines and greyness are nature's way of telling you not to fuck with someone - the equivalent of yellow and black lines on a wasp, or the markings on the back of a black widow spider."

"I am eating this noise like mouthfuls of freezing, glittering fog. I am filling with it. I am using it as energy. Because what you are, as a teenager, is a small, silver, empty rocket. And you use loud music as fuel, and then the information in books as maps and coordinates, to tell you where you're going."

"For a woman, every outfit is a hopeful spell, cast to influence the outcome of the day. An act of trying to predict your fate, like looking at your horoscope."

"Keith Richards is a man without regret. When I ask him if-given the chance to do it all over again-he'd start taking heroin, he doesn't pause. "Oh yes. Yes. There was a lot of experience in there-you meet a lot of weird people, different takes on life that you're not going to find if you don't go there. I loved a good high. And if you stay up, you get the songs that everyone else misses, because they're asleep. There's songs zooming around everywhere. There's songs zooming through here right now, in the air."

"And every book, you find, has its own social group--friends of its own it wants to introduce you to, like a party in the library that need never, ever end."
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