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"If it weren't for the last minute nothing would get done."
Author Name
Personal Development
"When you love someone, you don't care that she ate your sandwich. You only hope she found it delicious."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Some kleptomaniacs do not steal things only; they also, while some only, steal lovers."
Author Name
Personal Development
"You know, Aunt Tasha makes jokes about how youE1d actually be a better queen than the others, except sometimes . . . I donE1t think sheE1s joking."
Author Name
Personal Development
"A tie is what you get after ice cubes have wrestled with hot water."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Your party kicked so much ass!Even though you suck so much! It's like, instead of blood, your heart pumps liquid suck! But thanks for the beer!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"Some people make spectacles of themselves with a couple of glasses."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Everyone has a sense of humor. If you don't laugh at jokes, you probably laugh at opinions."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It's not that I really cheat at golf. I play for my health and a low score makes me feel better."
Author Name
Personal Development
"If you're brighter than a lightning bug, don't show your ass."
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Personal Development
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"This connection we have isn't going away, it's only getting stronger. Because the more I spend time with her, the closer I want to be."
Romance
"If my name was Richard, I'd go by Richard or Rich...not Dick. Hell I'd even settle for being called Chard."
Identity
"Hey, Carlos,' the Professor says when he walks in. 'How was REACH?''It sucked.''Can you be more specific?' my guardian asks.'It really sucked,' I elaborate, sarcasm dripping from every word."
Dialogue
"And my piece of advice is...don't flirt with any of the female instructors. They all have access to weapons bigger than yours."
Humor
"I thought we were gonna take this relationship slow.''A back rub is harmless.'My eyes roam over her kick-ass bikini-covered bod. 'I'll have you know I've been intimate with girls wearin' a lot more."
Affection
"Snakes don't have fuckin' legs, so how was I supposed to think there'd be one hidin' in the face of a damn rock that's ten feet below the summit?"
Adventure
"What's with all those tattoos? Makes you look like a hooligan.'I suspect I am a hooligan."
Identity
"Can I request another peer guide, One who isn't so happy to be at school at 7:30 a.m.?"
Teenager
"Alex and Carlos-the tag team from hell. They're the last people I need shit from right now. If they decide to trail me, too, I'll have an entire entourage.'I'm fine.'Then sit up and talk to us.'Okay, in that case I'm not fine. Go away. I moan. 'Unless you want me to puke all over you."
Conflict
"You know those giant stuffed-animal prizes at the carnival? The kind practically nobody wins, except the lucky few? I've never won one.''Yeah. I've never won one, either.''Alex was my giant prize. I hated you for taking him away,' she admits.I shrug. 'Yeah, well, stop hating me. I don't have him, either.''I don't hate you anymore,' she says. 'I've moved on.'I swallow and then say, 'Me, too.'Carmen chuckles. Then, just as she walks out of the room, I hear her mumble, 'Alex sure as hell hasn't."
Breakup
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