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Lewis Black

"If the people of New Zealand want to be part of our world, I believe they should hop off their islands, and push 'em closer."

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"If the people of New Zealand want to be part of our world, I believe they should hop off their islands, and push 'em closer."

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Donna Grant

"Often people display a curious respect for a man drunk, rather like the respect of simple races for the insane... There is something awe-inspiring in one who has lost all inhibitions."

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Donna Grant

"The last resort of kings, the cannonball. The last resort of the people, the paving stone."

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Donna Grant

"It is not true that people are naturally equal for no two people can be together for even a half an hour without one acquiring an evident superiority over the other."

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Donna Grant

"There are bad people who would be less dangerous if they were quite devoid of goodness."

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Donna Grant

"There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating - people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing."

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Donna Grant

"We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones."

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Donna Grant

"I do give books as gifts sometimes, when people would rather have one than a new Ferrari."

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Donna Grant

"If something in your writing gives support to people in their lives, that's more than just entertainment-which is what we writers all struggle to do, to touch people."

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Donna Grant

"Perhaps being old is having lighted rooms inside your head, and people in them, acting. People you know, yet can't quite name."

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Donna Grant

"The people I distrust most are those who want to improve our lives but have only one course of action."

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Lewis Black
"A father and two sons run Adelphia. It's a cable company. And they took from that company a billion dollars. A billion. Three people - three people took a billion dollars. What were they gonna do, start their own space program? 'Let's send the monkey to Mars, Dad!'"

Father

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Lewis Black
"And I know this happens because I took economics, and I'd explain it to ya, but I flunked that course. Not my fault. They taught it at 8 o'clock in the morning. And there is absolutely nothing you can learn out of one bloodshot eye."

Economics

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Lewis Black
"In my lifetime, we've gone from Eisenhower to George W. Bush. We've gone from John F. Kennedy to Al Gore. If this is evolution, I believe that in twelve years, we'll be voting for plants."

Evolution

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Lewis Black
"It's absolutely stupid that we live without an ozone layer. We have men, we've got rockets, we've got saran wrap - fix it!"

Men

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Lewis Black
"If the people of New Zealand want to be part of our world, I believe they should hop off their islands, and push 'em closer."

People

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Lewis Black
"Republicans have nothing but bad ideas and Democrats have no ideas."

Ideas

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Lewis Black
"If you're working out in front of a mirror and watching your muscles grow, your ego has reached a point where it is now eating itself. That's why I believe there should be a psychiatrist at every health club, so that when they see you doing this, they will take you away for a little chat."

Health

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