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Lois Greiman

"Maybe knowledge is power, but it ain't nearly as as satisfying as punching some smart ass in the chops."

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"Maybe knowledge is power, but it ain't nearly as as satisfying as punching some smart ass in the chops."

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Asa Don Brown

"I am the most pious person in the room. Even though I have no pie - I have pizza, and what can be more virtuous than eating all by yourself?"

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"I don't understand this irony - valuable things like cars, gold, diamond are made up of hard materials but most valuable things like money, contracts and books are made up of soft paper."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"Sandar came to stand beside him, frowning down at the crumpled High Lord. "He does not look so mighty lying there," he said wonderingly. "He does not look so much greater than me.""

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"In any case, a little danger is a small price to pay for ridding a place of tourists."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"Alas, Siddhartha, I see you suffering, but you're suffering a pain at which one would like to laugh, at which you'll soon laugh for yourself."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"That is correct," Zeus said. "The blood of Olympus was spilled. She is fully conscious.""Oh, come on!" Percy complained. "I get a little nosebleed and I wake up the entire earth? That's not fair!"

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"I can barely read my hand written notes, typed."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"A tree fears an axe even though its handle is made from it."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"The worst thing about irony for me is that it attenuates emotion."

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Personal Development

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Asa Don Brown

"Flowers and jewelry worked for most girls as a romantic gesture, but here I was, misty-eyed at watching him show my mother how to stab the shit out of him."

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Lois Greiman
"You guys gotta get a license to drive a Geo, but any doofus with a few good swimmers can be a father."

Parenting

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Lois Greiman
"In 50 years it won't matter if he's handsome, ugly, or dumb as a post, just try to find someone who don't make you want to shove a pitchfork up his nose."

Harmony

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Lois Greiman
"Men are like beer. Some are bold and some are smooth. But every damn one of 'em has a big-ass head full of air."

Humor

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Lois Greiman
"Apparently it takes, like, forty-seven muscles to frown. Flippin' the bird' s a hell of a lot easier."

Humor

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Lois Greiman
"There are 2 kinds of people in the world. Those who enjoy a nice salami and those who have no souls."

Humor

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Lois Greiman
"If you don't like your teeth, keep your mouth shut."

Restraint

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Lois Greiman
"Some people say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. In actuality, you have to make an incision through his skin, both dermis and epidermis, then carefully sever and separate the sternum. Only upon viewing the exposed thoracic cavity can you reach the heart--if indeed the male of the species actually possesses such an organ."

Satire

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Lois Greiman
"Today's problems are yesterday's mistakes coming back to bite you in the ass."

Consequences

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Lois Greiman
"Booze and boys, ain't nothing in the universe that'll make a girl stupid faster."

Temptation

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Lois Greiman
"You are a perfect woman, a magical blend of beauty, intelligence, and spirit. Without you, my life is nothing."

Admiration

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