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W. C. Fields

"Here lies W. C. Fields. I would rather be living in Philadelphia."

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"Here lies W. C. Fields. I would rather be living in Philadelphia."

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Akshay Vasu

"There is nothing in the world more shameful than establishing one's self on lies and fables."

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Akshay Vasu

"The moment a man talks to his fellows he begins to lie."

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Akshay Vasu

"Someone who always has to lie discovers that every one of his lies is true."

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Personal Development

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Akshay Vasu

"I have a punishing workout regimen. Every day I do 3 minutes on a treadmill, then I lie down, drink a glass of vodka and smoke a cigarette."

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Akshay Vasu

"Our main agenda is to have ALL guns banned. We must use whatever means possible. It doesn't matter if you have to distort facts or even lie. Our task of creating a socialist America can only succeed when those who would resist us have been totally disarmed."

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Akshay Vasu

"When it comes to my own turn to lay my weapons down, I shall do so with thankfulness and fatigue, and whatever be my destiny afterward, I shall be glad to lie down with my fathers in honor. It is human at least, if not divine."

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Akshay Vasu

"The most common lie is that which one lies to himself; lying to others is relatively an exception."

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Akshay Vasu

"When you crop the photo, you tell a lie."

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Akshay Vasu

"There is no sickness worse for me than words that to be kind must lie."

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Akshay Vasu

"A lie never lives to be old."

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W. C. Fields
"Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against."

Hell

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W. C. Fields
"The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep."

Cure

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W. C. Fields
"Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream."

Fish

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W. C. Fields
"There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink it."

Liquor

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W. C. Fields
"I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes."

Water

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W. C. Fields
"I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison."

Father

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W. C. Fields
"Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times."

Drink

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W. C. Fields
"Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live."

Heart

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W. C. Fields
"Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people."

People

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W. C. Fields
"Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned."

May

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