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"Men are able to trust one another, knowing the exact degree of dishonesty they are entitled to expect."
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"You can't trust anyone you have to pay, and really, they can't trust you."

"Nothing is more despicable than respect based on fear."

"Look, he said, "the point is there's no way to be a hundred percent sure about anyone or anything. So you're left with a choice. Either hope for the best, or just expect the worst.If you expect the worst, you're never disappointed, I pointed out.Yeah, but who lives like that?"

"It is not something you can tell by looking at a person, but trust is always being increased or decreased as you interact with a person."

"All my life, he said, I been witness to people showin up where they was supposed to be at various times after they'd said they'd be there. I never heard one yet that didnt have a reason for it.Yessir.But there aint but one reason.Yessir.You know what it is?No sir.It's that their word's no good. That's the only reason there ever was or ever will be."

"Wherever you will go, I will let you down, But this lullaby goes on."

"We are always paid for our suspicion by finding what we suspect."
Explore more quotes by Stephen Leacock


"Now, the essence, the very spirit of Christmas is that we first make believe a thing is so, and lo, it presently turns out to be so."


"If every day in the life of a school could be the last day but one, there would be little fault to find with it."


"It's called political economy because it is has nothing to do with either politics or economy."


"What we call creative work, ought not to be called work at all, because it isn't. I imagine that Thomas Edison never did a day's work in his last fifty years."


"The classics are only primitive literature. They belong to the same class as primitive machinery and primitive music and primitive medicine."


"There are two things in ordinary conversation which ordinary people dislike - information and wit."


"Writing is no trouble: you just jot down ideas as they occur to you. The jotting is simplicity itself - it is the occurring which is difficult."


"We think of the noble object for which the professor appears tonight, we may be assured that the Lord will forgive any one who will laugh at the professor."


"Electricity is of two kinds, positive and negative. The difference is, I presume, that one comes a little more expensive, but is more durable; the other is a cheaper thing, but the moths get into it."
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