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"Teasing and a sense of humor, if you can develop that in your kids, and if you can exercise it with the kids, just makes for a pleasanter atmosphere."
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"A fashionable milieu is one in which everybody's opinion is made up of the opinion of all the others. Has everybody a different opinion? Then it is a literary milieu."
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Personal Development
"So, while we're sitting here on this luxury yacht enjoying our bread and water, why doesn't someone tell me the plan?"
Author Name
Personal Development
"After all, that's all a man really needs: a big city full of sin and sleaze, and a chance."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I don't envy "busy." Busy means having a schedule, not living life. What I really covet is leisure and peace of mind. Those who have both, have it all."
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Personal Development
"Getting through life without a lot of money, possessions, and/or friends is admirable, especially if it is by choice."
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Personal Development
"Some days you live in pajamas, and your hair kind-of has that Albert Einstein look."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Luckily, I always travel with a book, just in case I have to wait on line for Santa, or some such inconvenience."
Author Name
Personal Development
"There is no such thing as a good call at 7 AM. It's been my experience that all calls between the hours of 11 PM and 9 AM are disaster calls."
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Personal Development
"Because sometimes you just have to dance like a madman in the Self-Help section of your local bookstore."
Author Name
Personal Development
"A person who is in a constant rat race seldom has time to think whether or not he is living his life properly."
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Personal Development
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"America wasn't founded so that we could all be better. America was founded so we could all be anything we damned well pleased."
America
"Children must be considered in a divorce considered valuable pawns in the nasty legal and financial contest that is about to ensue."
Legal
"Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power."
Love
"Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over a bad marriage than you ever can from a good divorce."
Marriage
"The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it."
Government
"In our brief national history we have shot four of our presidents, worried five of them to death, impeached one and hounded another out of office. And when all else fails, we hold an election and assassinate their character."
History
"A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat."
Life
"The weirder you're going to behave, the more normal you should look. It works in reverse, too. When I see a kid with three or four rings in his nose, I know there is absolutely nothing extraordinary about that person."
Nothing
"There's something about Marxism that brings out warts; the only kind of growth this economic system encourages."
Growth
"Making fun of born-again Christians is like hunting dairy cows with a high powered rifle and scope."
Cows
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