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Dave Barry

"I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don't even invite me."

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"I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don't even invite me."

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Akiroq Brost

"Love your haters, they're the ones who are really paying attention to you."

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Akiroq Brost

"Not only believe in yourself but trust in yourself. Confidence will bloom."

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Akiroq Brost

"Take control from the moment you step in her place. She'll be pleasantly surprised and impressed."

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Akiroq Brost

"Be bold! You will then see that life will find no time to attack you, because you are attacking it!"

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Akiroq Brost

"Be fearlessly authentic."

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Akiroq Brost

"With some money in your pocket you walk confidently, you talk confidently and you work confidently."

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Akiroq Brost

"Acting with confidence, but inside lacking certainty, I'd told her I could."

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Akiroq Brost

"The monitors indicated that it was a credible election, I think, in an overall sense, it apparently is a free and fair election, so it's a real milestone and one of the things we can take some little confidence in."

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Akiroq Brost

"Sometimes things work just because you think they work. It's as good a definition of faith as any."

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Dave Barry
"Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night."
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Dave Barry
"As you get older; you've probably noticed that you tend to forget things. You'll be talking with somebody at a party, and you'll know that you know this person, but no matter how hard you try, you can't remember his or her name. This can be very embarassing, especially if he or she turns out to be your spouse."
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Dave Barry
"Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your television without seeing them, although sometimes you have to hunt around."
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Dave Barry
"My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as soon as possible."
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Dave Barry
"The Sixties are now considered a historical period, just like the Roman Empire."
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Dave Barry
"Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects."
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Dave Barry
"Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance."
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Dave Barry
"Miami drivers will attempt to pass you inside a car wash."
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Dave Barry
"Aside from velcro, time is the most mysterious substance in the universe. You can't see it or touch it, yet a plumber can charge you upwards of seventy-five dollars per hour for it, without necessarily fixing anything."
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Dave Barry
"Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear."
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