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Joan Rivers

"I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking."

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"I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking."

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Amber Hurdle

"I just think that all of us in this room should have a voice in how the USA is represented. And he don't allow us our voice, that's all I'm saying."

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Amber Hurdle

"Matisse was very clear about saying that you have to blow your own trumpet and explain yourself, which I think has been slightly forgotten."

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Amber Hurdle

"Everyone has highs and lows that they have to learn from, but every morning I start off with a good head on my shoulders, saying to myself, 'It's going to be a good day!'."

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Amber Hurdle

"Saying you have a political solution is like saying you can write a pop song that's going to stay at the top of the list forever. I don't have many illusions about this, but I'm not cynical about it."

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Amber Hurdle

"Many attempts to communicate are nullified by saying too much."

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Amber Hurdle

"I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying."

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Amber Hurdle

"Between saying and doing, many a pair of shoes is worn out."

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Amber Hurdle

"Either you repeat the same conventional doctrines everybody is saying, or else you say something true, and it will sound like it's from Neptune."

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Amber Hurdle

"Well, sometimes when you say you want to be like everybody else, you're really saying that you're not."

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Amber Hurdle

"If somebody's pointing a trembling finger at your pants and saying you shouldn't be doing that, follow that finger back, go up the arm and look at the head that's behind it, because there's almost always something fairly woolly in there."

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Joan Rivers
"My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on."
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Joan Rivers
"Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer."
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Joan Rivers
"It's been so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up whom."
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Joan Rivers
"If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor."
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Joan Rivers
"A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp."
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Joan Rivers
"The ideal beauty is a fugitive which is never found."
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Joan Rivers
"It's so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up who."
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Joan Rivers
"Is Elizabeth Taylor fat? Her favorite food is seconds."
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Joan Rivers
"I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, 'Get the hell off my property.'"
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Joan Rivers
"Forty for you, sixty for me. And equal partners we will be."
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