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Joan Rivers

"I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking."

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"I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking."

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Asa Don Brown

"I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying."

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Asa Don Brown

"Ronald Reagan used to alarm his Soviet counterparts by saying that surely they'd both unite against an invasion from Mars."

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Asa Don Brown

"Matisse was very clear about saying that you have to blow your own trumpet and explain yourself, which I think has been slightly forgotten."

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Asa Don Brown

"This is about Floridians saying what's most important to them and making sure that we create an agenda that we can drive and deliver back in Washington, D.C. So it's very exciting."

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Asa Don Brown

"If a thing isn't worth saying, you sing it."

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Asa Don Brown

"Everyone has highs and lows that they have to learn from, but every morning I start off with a good head on my shoulders, saying to myself, 'It's going to be a good day!'."

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Asa Don Brown

"I keep saying the word "weird" over and over again, but it's the only way I can describe it."

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Asa Don Brown

"Because Hightower's problem, among other things, is that advertisers would be a lot less interested in his show than in Limbaugh's, even if they have similar ratings, because of what Hightower is saying."

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Asa Don Brown

"You really have to listen to yourself and know if what someone is saying is true for you."

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Asa Don Brown

"So it's mix and match. Hold your line when you really feel something you're saying is wonderful and you really want to get this point across and prove it to your partner by just throwing it into the tape and letting it speak for itself."

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Joan Rivers
"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath.' For three years my husband and I slept in bunk beds."
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Joan Rivers
"Is Elizabeth Taylor fat? Her favorite food is seconds."
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Joan Rivers
"Forty for you, sixty for me. And equal partners we will be."
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Joan Rivers
"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call it the present."
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Joan Rivers
"It's been so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up whom."
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Joan Rivers
"I don't excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor."
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Joan Rivers
"Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer."
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Joan Rivers
"People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made."
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Joan Rivers
"If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor."
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Joan Rivers
"My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on."
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