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"When I read something saying I've not done anything as good as "Catch-22" I'm tempted to reply, "Who has?""
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"I remember Mitch Miller saying every week, This rock and roll stuff will never last. But one doesn't like to bring that up to Mitch."
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Personal Development

"Well, as I was saying... everyone's so nice to me, usually."
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Personal Development

"If somebody's pointing a trembling finger at your pants and saying you shouldn't be doing that, follow that finger back, go up the arm and look at the head that's behind it, because there's almost always something fairly woolly in there."
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"At least when it's in French, I won't know what the heck they're saying."
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"Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted."
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"When I read something saying I've not done anything as good as "Catch-22" I'm tempted to reply, "Who has?""
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"I have to say that when I was young, when any politician was talking I wasn't even interested. Maybe they were saying some nice stuff, but then if you put Michael Jordan on TV, I was interested!"
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"Style is a simple way of saying complicated things."
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"I don't believe what the papers are saying They're just out to capture my dime, Exaggerating this, exaggerating that."
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"I'm not saying that the gas chambers didn't exist. I couldn't see them myself."
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"Every writer I know has trouble writing."
Trouble

"I don't believe in miracles because it's been a long time since we've had any."
Time

"Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them."
People

"There was only one catch and that was Catch-22. Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn't, but if he was sane he had to fly them. If he flew them he was crazy and didn't have to; but if he didn't want to he was sane and had to."
Want

"Lots of people who complained about us receiving the MBE received theirs for heroism in the war - for killing people. We received ours for entertaining other people. I'd say we deserve ours more."
War

"When I read something saying I've not done anything as good as "Catch-22" I'm tempted to reply, "Who has?""
Saying

"I think in every country that there is at least one executive who is scared of going crazy."
Nation

"When I grow up I want to be a little boy."
Want

"Rise above principle and do what's right."
Morality

"Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry."
Government
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