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"There are a hell of a lot of jobs that are scarier than live comedy. Like standing in the operating room when a guy's heart stops, and you're the one who has to fix it!"
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"My heart is aching for the people of Nice, Italy. I am so sad that I have no words to express my frustration."
"While we tediously check our weaponry before entering into battle, do we check our hearts? For without exception, that is the greatest weapon of all."
"Go to you bosom: Knock there, and ask your heart what it doth know."
"I'll give you my opinion of the human race in a nutshell... their heart's in the right place, but their head is a thoroughly inefficient organ."
"The intellect is always fooled by the heart."
"It is the state of the heart within us that determines the nature of the triggers we will pull outside of us."
Explore more quotes by Jon Stewart
"Here's the point - you're looking at affirmative action, and you're looking at marijuana. You legalize marijuana, no need for quotas, because really, who's gonna wanna work?"
"You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back on my career and be proud of the work, and be proud that I tried everything. Yes, I want to look back and know that I was terrible at a variety of things."
"The Supreme Court ruled that disabled golfer Casey Martin has a legal right to ride in a golf cart between shots at PGA Tour events. Man, the next thing you know, they're going to have some guy carry his clubs around for him."
"Yesterday, the president met with a group he calls the coalition of the willing. Or, as the rest of the world calls them, Britain and Spain."
"I've been to Canada, and I've always gotten the impression that I could take the country over in about two days."
"There is no such thing as an impartial jury because there are no impartial people. There are people that argue on the web for hours about who their favorite character on "Friends" is."
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