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"Republicans have nothing but bad ideas and Democrats have no ideas."
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"As Oscar Wilde should have said, when bad ideas have nowhere else to go, they emigrate to America and become university courses."

"Storytelling is the most powerful way to put ideas into the world today."

"Every idea, both good and bad will definitely have an opposition. The fact that someone mocks your ideas and dreams does not mean they are bad. Take note!"

"It is easy to destroy a book, but an idea once implanted has roots no man can utterly destroy."

"If Pakistan has any ideas of annexing any part of our territories by force, she should think afresh. I want to state categorically that force will be met with force and aggression against us will never be allowed to succeed."
Explore more quotes by Lewis Black

"And I know this happens because I took economics, and I'd explain it to ya, but I flunked that course. Not my fault. They taught it at 8 o'clock in the morning. And there is absolutely nothing you can learn out of one bloodshot eye."

"If you're working out in front of a mirror and watching your muscles grow, your ego has reached a point where it is now eating itself. That's why I believe there should be a psychiatrist at every health club, so that when they see you doing this, they will take you away for a little chat."

"If the people of New Zealand want to be part of our world, I believe they should hop off their islands, and push 'em closer."

"It's absolutely stupid that we live without an ozone layer. We have men, we've got rockets, we've got saran wrap - fix it!"

"In my lifetime, we've gone from Eisenhower to George W. Bush. We've gone from John F. Kennedy to Al Gore. If this is evolution, I believe that in twelve years, we'll be voting for plants."

"A father and two sons run Adelphia. It's a cable company. And they took from that company a billion dollars. A billion. Three people - three people took a billion dollars. What were they gonna do, start their own space program? 'Let's send the monkey to Mars, Dad!'"
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