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"I was realizing something I should have known by using my intelligence, without ever having gone to their flat at all: that the ties between Nelson and his wife are bitterly close, and never to be broken in their lives. They are tied by the closest of all bonds, neurotic pain-giving; the experience of pain dealt and received; pain as an aspect of love; apprehended as a knowledge of what the world is, what growth is.Nelson is about to leave his wife; he will never leave her. She will wail at being rejected and abandoned; she does not know she will never be rejected."
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"If love has taken us for a ride and passion made us ignore sham and swindle, the time has come to separate the wheat from the chaff and polish up diamonds of trust, neatly, day by day. ['Taken for a ride']"
"Some seem to be desynchronized in their relationships. They feel oppressed, because they cannot move forward together and at the same pace. Their thinking is often incongruent, their motivation disparate. The phone could be a mediator, as it creates an impression to be a perfect reliable friend. However, in the end, it causes rather a sense of isolation, since it divides more than it unites. Eventually it appears not to be such a good friend but only a ghost friend. ['Kein Schwein ruft mich an']"
"This last week has been a little hell for both of us simply because I didn't understand my own feelings. And because I can't understand them, I blame her for provoking in me feelings that make my world seem suddenly unsafe."
"Most women think cheating is 'disgusting' - until they fall for a man that likes them back, but isn't willing to leave his lover for them."
"Unless you can be yourself, you won't stay with anyone for long."
"The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed."
"I like your mind when it plays with mine. We harmonize, like a dirty sweet symphony."
"Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to."
"Any marriage can last forever, as long as both partners remain committed to their vows."
"My growth as a human being has been directly proportional to my growth as a marital artist."
Explore more quotes by Doris Lessing
"There's an unconscious bias in our society: girls are wonderful; boys are terrible. And to be a boy, or young man, growing up, having to listen to all this, it must be painful."
"Loneliness, she thought, was craving for other people's company. But she did not know that loneliness can be an unnoticed cramping of the spirit for lack of companionship."
"The boulder is the truth that the great men know by instinct, and the mountain is the stupidity of mankind."
"Borrowing is not much better than begging; just as lending with interest is not much better than stealing."
"In university they don't tell you that the greater part of the law is learning to tolerate fools."
"There is only one real sin and that is to persuade oneself that the second best is anything but second best."
"Yet I am incapable of writing the only kind of novel which interests me: a book powered with an intellectual or moral passion strong enough to create order, to create a new way of looking at life. It is because I am too diffused. I have decided never to write another novel. I have fifty 'subjects' I could write about; and they would be competent enough. If there is one thing we can be sure of, it is that competent and informative novels will continue to pour from the publishing houses. I have only one, and the least important, of the qualities necessary to write at all, and that is curiosity. It is the curiosity of the journalist."
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