"Late night television is ready for someone like me... standards have gone to an all-time low."

Night, Television

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"The night creeps in by subtle degrees while a show of fierce colors attracts and distracts me. I look up, suddenly aware of remote lights scattered overhead. I gasp as the last streak of fire dies on the horizon, and I comprehend it all too late. That crafty, dark night has swallowed my world whole."

Richelle E. Goodrich, American Poet

Night, Truth, Wisdom, Happiness, Regret

"I can find in my undergraduate classes, bright students who do not know that the stars rise and set at night, or even that the Sun is a star."

Carl Sagan, American Scientist

Night, Stars, Students, Sun

"I wasn't really qualified to be on Saturday Night Live - I'm not like an impressionist or anything."

Victoria Jackson, American Comedian

Night,

"I was working at this club in downtown L.A. from four to eight at night, just Eddie Rubin, the drummer, and I."

Johnny Rivers, American Musician

Night,

"It is always consoling to think of suicide: in that way one gets through many a bad night."

Friedrich Nietzsche, German Philosopher

Night,

"Like every other place, I guess, Kansas City was quite a different city when I was a youngster there. They had quite a few clubs, and we had what we used to call jam sessions every night."

Ben Webster, American Musician

Night,

"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."

Woody Allen, American Director

Night,

"I've long ago compromised my eight hours a night."

Tim Robbins, American Actor

Night,

"Last night I dreamt I ate a ten pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow was gone."

Tommy Cooper, British Comedian

Night,

"One or two of the trips were a bit scary. Soldiers had me at gun point on one trip, locked me in my van all night and escorted me in and out of buildings when I wanted to wash."

Joey Dunlop, Irish Celebrity

Night, Soldiers

Explore more quotes by Howard Stern

"I seem to be some sort of lightning rod. I just really irritate people, you know? I really do."

People

"I will never feel successful."

Success

"I'm sickened by all religions. Religion has divided people. I don't think there's any difference between the pope wearing a large hat and parading around with a smoking purse and an African painting his face white and praying to a rock."

Religion

"Well, first of all, I'm worth every penny."

First

"There are things that I won't do on the radio. I mean, the next logical question is, what won't you do. I say, well, you know, you've got to find out when you're on the air."

Question

"It's no treat being in bed with me."

Bed

"I think people of lesser talent will become stars."

Talent

"We are busy planning the launch of the channel. I am busy planning all kinds of events that go on the channel without me. I have started producing a sound for the channel."

Events

"Okay, well, I guess I'm still a kid. Because when I get really angry and fired up and I feel like my back is up against the wall, I will say vicious things."

Will

"My show was revolutionary, ground-breaking. When I came on the scene, people were not doing a thing."

People