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Erma Bombeck

"In Russia, as I sat there day after day wearing headphones, listening to the interpreter struggle to make our words relevant, I wondered if we could establish meaningful rapport with a nation that had never seen raisins dance in dark glasses on TV...never had a garage sale."

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"In Russia, as I sat there day after day wearing headphones, listening to the interpreter struggle to make our words relevant, I wondered if we could establish meaningful rapport with a nation that had never seen raisins dance in dark glasses on TV...never had a garage sale."

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Amber Hurdle

"Menfolks listens to somebody because of what he says. Women don't. They don't care what he said. They listens because of what he is."

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Personal Development

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Amber Hurdle

"The Frenchman works until he can play. The American works until he can't play; and then thanks the devil, his master, that he is donkey enough to die in harness. But the Englishman, as he has since become, works until he can pretend that he never worked at all."

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Amber Hurdle

"I look forward to an America which will not be afraid of grace and beauty."

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Amber Hurdle

"Only Southerners have taken horsewhips and pistols to editors about the treatment or maltreatment of their manuscript. This--the actual pistols--was in the old days, of course, we no longer succumb to the impulse. But it is still there, within us."

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Amber Hurdle

"For in Mexico, ladies and gentlemen, it's always high noon and what glows is fuchsia and what's dead is dead and no feather-dusters."

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Amber Hurdle

"It has always been the prime function of mythology and rite to supply the symbols that carry the human spirit forward, in counteraction to those that tend to tie it back."

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Amber Hurdle

"Just when you see a kid selling a mascot,If you don't buy it because he winks, Not only that will be considered a "boycott",Xenophobically, it will also be a jinx!"

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Personal Development

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Amber Hurdle

"Writers are much better behaved nowadays, for a couple of reasons. Once upon a time nobody was thinking of a career, unless you lived in New York, so there wasn't as much pressure to present a respectable exterior. And secondly, there was no social media. So if you were found face down on the floor - people did do that quite a bit; usually men, but not always - or fell through plate glass windows or got into scrapes, it became a rumour, and rumours are hard to pin down."

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Amber Hurdle

"Nobody read books, but women, parsons and idle people."

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Amber Hurdle

"This history of culture will explain to us the motives, the conditions of life, and the thought of the writer or reformer."

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Erma Bombeck
"When humor goes, there goes civilization."

Humor

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Erma Bombeck
"Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time."

Car

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Erma Bombeck
"Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you."

Home

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Erma Bombeck
"On vacations: We hit the sunny beaches where we occupy ourselves keeping the sun off our skin, the saltwater off our bodies, and the sand out of our belongings."

Vacation

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Erma Bombeck
"I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes."

Society

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Erma Bombeck
"Written on her tombstone: 'I told you I was sick."

Humor

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Erma Bombeck
"Sometimes I can't figure designers out. It's as if they flunked human anatomy."

Mind

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Erma Bombeck
"One never realizes how different a husband and wife can be until they begin to pack for a trip."

Ambition

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Erma Bombeck
"In Russia, as I sat there day after day wearing headphones, listening to the interpreter struggle to make our words relevant, I wondered if we could establish meaningful rapport with a nation that had never seen raisins dance in dark glasses on TV...never had a garage sale."

Culture

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Erma Bombeck
"Everyone is guilty at one time or another of throwing out questions that beg to be ignored, but mothers seem to have a market on the supply. 'Do you want a spanking or do you want to go to bed?' Don't you want to save some of the pizza for your brother?' Wasn't there any change?"

Society

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