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"Last night I dreamt I ate a ten pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow was gone."
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"The night creeps in by subtle degrees while a show of fierce colors attracts and distracts me. I look up, suddenly aware of remote lights scattered overhead. I gasp as the last streak of fire dies on the horizon, and I comprehend it all too late. That crafty, dark night has swallowed my world whole."
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Personal Development
"If it comes back, I think that Friday night is not a good night to be on."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I feel my shows are like a late-night talk show that we settle down and do every night."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It is always consoling to think of suicide: in that way one gets through many a bad night."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The two hours onstage is great. But I can only play a show and then take a night off. I have to sing for two hours, and then I've gotta rest it for a night. So it's the other 46 hours that are just boring as heck."
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Personal Development
"His mouth had been used as a latrine by some small creature of the night, and then as its mausoleum."
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Personal Development
"I often lay on that bench looking up into the tree, past the trunk and up into the branches. It was particularly fine at night with the stars above the tree."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It was in the Seventies but I still recall what was a good night for my club. Of course, the stadium has changed now but I have heard that the atmosphere is still the same."
Author Name
Personal Development
"We then went through the audition process and picked a guy named Richard Campbell and he is no secret to L.A. players as he was with Natalie Cole for years and Three Dog Night."
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"So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you give me a lift?' I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'"
Car
"Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off."
Drink
"A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'"
Blind
"Last night I dreamt I ate a ten pound marshmallow. When I woke up the pillow was gone."
Night
"Well, my wife and I were married in a toilet - it was a marriage of convenience!"
Marriage
"So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'"
Building
"A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'"
Age
"I used to be indecisive but now I am not quite sure."
Now
"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'"
Driving
"So he said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library.' I thought 'That's a turn-up for the books.'"
Thought
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