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"I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next to me is Dean Martin."
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"Woman is a vulgar animal from whom man has created an excessively beautiful ideal."

"If women are supposed to be less rational and more emotional at the beginning of our menstrual cycle when the female hormone is at its lowest level, then why isn't it logical to say that, in those few days, women behave the most like the way men behave all month long?"
Explore more quotes by Joe E. Lewis

"I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster."
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