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"Flowers are evil, because they live just to die for the love of other people. You don't believe me? Try it for yourself and see if you'll be good afterwards. Undeath is a way of life, for some things. That doesn't make it good or anything. Especially anything. Nothing makes anything anything. Because nothing is a serious matter, and anything just is."
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"It was like being at an Arabian hoedown with a band of psychedelic hillbillies (p. 171)."
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Personal Development
"He's got a can up there,' Richard said."
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Personal Development
"Her latest client is Professor Desmond Curnin, a university professor who teaches library sciences to large groups of students. He's quick to pay on-time, quick to never fall behind. He's a brown-haired man with an unkempt beard and thick-framed hipster glasses. He slides a leather briefcase stuffed with dollar bills into the open window of Geraldine's car. "Your fly's unzipped, Geraldine points out, disgusted. "Who gave you a license to sell hot dogs, buddy?"
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Personal Development
"The concept of absurdity is something I'm attracted to."
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Personal Development
"No people find each other more absurd than lovers."
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Personal Development
"Perhaps after all she put me in her rectum. A matter of complete indifference to me, I needn't tell you. But is it true love, in the rectum? That's what bothers me sometimes. Have I never known true love, after all?"
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Personal Development
"Nothing happened. Nothing continued to happen. More Nothing. The Return of Nothing. Son of Nothing. Nothing Rides Again. Nothing and Abbot and Costello meet the Wolfman..."
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Personal Development
"Bursar?"Yes, Archchancellor?"You ain't a member of some secret society or somethin', are you?"Me? No, Archchancellor."Then it'd be a damn good idea to take your underpants off your head."
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Personal Development
"Annihilation is an absurdity in terms."
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Personal Development
"If we loved Steve Aylett, really loved him in the way that he deserves, a selfless love that genuinely wanted nothing save his happiness and comfort, we'd lobotomise him."
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"An imaginary friend once asked me why Americans can't stand Russia. The answer was cold, deadly, silent, and, well expected. It's because in Soviet Russia nothing happens anymore, because it doesn't exist anymore. And Americans are all about happenings. If there isn't one " they don't go where it isn't, because there isn't anything to happen to them there."
Satire
"I flow like a butter in the nailed pan I stole. I also kept the nail, to polish and use as a means of teleportation."
Absurdity
"Some people are so much heaven to the square inch that life is simply hell, when she leaves you in order to go south for the winter. (Yes, women are people too, sometimes even threee.)"
Love
"A book about books is like a poem about poetry:Books are knowledge, paid for, all.Readers - horses in a stall.Stallions should always run.Lest they stale become, in turn.Running waters are most clear.In some books, you disappear "lose yourself, and track of time.How I wish that one was mine...Mine, to have, to write, to read...Mine, just like a flying steed.Mine, forever, - to improve.Would I then, of me, approve?I would not, I can't... myself.I'm but dust, swept off a shelf.Fly, can I, just 'til I'm settled,down, beside my flower, petalled."
Knowledge
"To fall in love twice, with the same person, you need to grow another heart. That's all I do in my secret underground laboratory at night..."
Fantasy
"Nostalgia is missing what might come back."
Nostalgia
"Once a cat loves you, it loves you till the end."
Relationship
"Life is always just to learn."
Life
"I'll make a book on learning how to be a complete moron someday, and I'm sure no one will buy it, because everyone will have mastered that already by the time I gather enough moronism to process it into digestible upgrade instructions for your average village cyborg-idiot."
Humor
"I sometimes go to a mythical place called 'workplace', where the doable is always unpassable as possible, especially when it pisses you off."
Work
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