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"Women: You can't live with them, and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume and beat you with a warm squash or something."
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"Hey, I'm a girl, and we like to play dress-up."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I don't want to dress up a picture with just my face."
Author Name
Personal Development
"They are best dressed, whose dress no one observes."
Author Name
Personal Development
"If you dress like a movie star, you have me."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I usually dress very casual. Whenever I go out with my friends, I'm always like, 'Can't I just wear sweatpants?'"
Author Name
Personal Development
"I'm kind of a quirky dresser usually. Like today, I'm actually pretty put together, but I dress kind of off sometimes, but that's just part of my personality."
Author Name
Personal Development
"In the sequence where I am burned at the stake, everything was so casual and hazardous that the bottom of my dress caught fire, and the grips became hysterical as they tried to pull me off the stake."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The law is simply expediency wearing a long white dress."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I like the fact that Jack is always wearing a tie except when he's on a mission. I do like it when I get out there and dress up, or dress down, a little bit."
Author Name
Personal Development
"You will put on a dress of guilt and shoes with broken high ideals."
Author Name
Personal Development
More
"I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper."
Men
"I was the kid next door's imaginary friend."
Friendship
"Actually, my cd was released in 1985, in return for two German missionaries and a Dutch urologist."
Missionaries
"The way I understand it, the Russians are sort of a combination of evil and incompetence... sort of like the Post Office with tanks."
Evil
"England is better only because I stand out there as 'unusual'."
England
"At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote."
First
"My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, where they are safe."
Jokes
"I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy."
Beer
"I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky, but there wasn't any gum under any of them."
Night
"I was with this girl the other night and from the way she was responding to my skillful caresses, you would have sworn that she was conscious from the top of her head to the tag on her toes."
Night
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