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Edward Lear

"There was an old man with a beard, who said: 'It is just as I feared! Two owls and a hen, four larks and a wren have all built their nests in my beard."

Edward Lear, English Artist
Humor, Larks, Man, Old, Owls
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"There was an old man with a beard, who said: 'It is just as I feared! Two owls and a hen, four larks and a wren have all built their nests in my beard."

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Amber Hurdle

"Laughter comes later, like wisdom teeth. And laughter at yourself comes last of all in a mad race with death. And sometimes, it isn't in time."

John Steinbeck, American Author
Humor, Laughter, Wisdom, Mortality
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Amber Hurdle

"Pessimist - one who when he has the choice of two evils chooses both."

Oscar Wilde, Irish Dramatist
Humor, Pessimism, Evil, Choice, Irony
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Amber Hurdle

"Pardon my French if you're a religious man.''I am,' Bill said, grinning.'Then get outta my cab and go to fucking church,' the cabbie said, and they both burst out laughing."

Stephen King, American Author
Humor, Faith, Truth, Wisdom
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Amber Hurdle

"Mr. Bennet, how can you abuse your own children in such a way? Youtake delight in vexing me. You have no compassion for my poor nerves.""You mistake me, my dear. I have a high respect for your nerves. Theyare my old friends. I have heard you mention them with considerationthese last twenty years at least."

Jane Austen, British Writer
Humor, Marriage, Family, Nerves
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Amber Hurdle

"You can be a little ungrammatical if you come from the right part of the country."

Robert Frost, American Poet
Humor, Country, Right
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Amber Hurdle

"April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four."

Mark Twain, American Author
Humor, April, Fool, Day
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Amber Hurdle

"Did you hear what I was playing, Lane?I didn't think it polite to listen, sir."

Oscar Wilde, Irish Dramatist
Humor, Politeness, Listening, Conversation
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Amber Hurdle

"Never try to out-stubborn a cat."

Robert A. Heinlein, American Writer
Humor, Animals, Cats, Wisdom
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Amber Hurdle

"In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then he made school boards."

Mark Twain, American Author
Humor, God, Idiots, Practice, School
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Amber Hurdle

"I am the literary equivalent of a Big Mac and Fries."

Stephen King, American Author
Humor, Literary

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Edward Lear
"Two old Bachelors were living in one house; One caught a Muffin, the other caught a Mouse."
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Edward Lear
"I was much distressed by next door people who had twin babies and played the violin; but one of the twins died, and the other has eaten the fiddle, so all is peace."
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Edward Lear
"They dined on mince, and slices of quince, Which they ate with a runcible spoon; And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand, They danced by the light of the moon."
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Edward Lear
"There was an old man with a beard, who said: 'It is just as I feared! Two owls and a hen, four larks and a wren have all built their nests in my beard."
Humor
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