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P. J. O'Rourke

"The Nobel Peace Prize has always been a joke - albeit a grim one. Alfred Bernhard Nobel famously invented dynamite and felt sorry about it."

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"The Nobel Peace Prize has always been a joke - albeit a grim one. Alfred Bernhard Nobel famously invented dynamite and felt sorry about it."

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Donna Grant

"Robbing people of their actual history is the same as robbing them of part of themselves. It's a crime."Fuka-Eri thought about that for a moment.Tengo went on, "Our memory is made up of our individual memories and our collective memories. The two are intimately linked. And history is our collective memory. If our collective memory is taken from us - is rewritten - we lose the ability to sustain our true selves."

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Donna Grant

"Mankind, not womankind, has slaughtered more humans in the name of God and Religion than for any other reason."

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Donna Grant

"Many if not most slaves would have each readily jumped, and many if not most slaves would each readily jump, at the opportunity to be a master, if such an opportunity presents or had presented itself."

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Donna Grant

"Most of Jesus' life is told through the four Gospels of the New Testament, known as the Canonical gospels, written by Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. These are not biographies in the modern sense but accounts with allegorical intent. They are written to engender faith in Jesus as the Messiah and the incarnation of God, and not to provide factual data about Jesus's life. This left the door of exaggeration open. And through that door all kinds of mystical non-sense crept in and made place right alongside the good philosophical teachings of Jesus."

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Donna Grant

"I have no expectation that any man will read history aright who thinks that what was done in a remote age, by men whose names have resounded far, has any deeper sense than what he is doing today."

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Donna Grant

"It must be the full confession by Christendom of Christendom's specific contribution to the sum of human cruelty and treachery."

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Donna Grant

"It was the greatest, most intricate, most ingenious and most costly rescue mission in all of human history."

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Donna Grant

"You should read history and look at ostracism, persecution, martyrdom, and that kind of thing. They always happen to the best men, you know."

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Donna Grant

"There probably was a time when the idea of having a toilet inside a house was repulsive."

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Donna Grant

"All the bloodsheds in human history have been caused by men, not women."

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P. J. O'Rourke
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible."

Woman

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P. J. O'Rourke
"Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does it to somebody else. This is the idea behind foreign policy."

Government

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P. J. O'Rourke
"You may be surprised to discover you're rich, especially if you're broke."

May

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P. J. O'Rourke
"The weirder you're going to behave, the more normal you should look. It works in reverse, too. When I see a kid with three or four rings in his nose, I know there is absolutely nothing extraordinary about that person."

Nothing

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P. J. O'Rourke
"The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it."

Government

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P. J. O'Rourke
"Every government is a parliament of whores. The trouble is, in a democracy, the whores are us."

Government

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P. J. O'Rourke
"In our brief national history we have shot four of our presidents, worried five of them to death, impeached one and hounded another out of office. And when all else fails, we hold an election and assassinate their character."

History

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P. J. O'Rourke
"The Clinton administration launched an attack on people in Texas because those people were religious nuts with guns. Hell, this country was founded by religious nuts with guns. Who does Bill Clinton think stepped ashore on Plymouth Rock?"

People

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P. J. O'Rourke
"I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a "learning experience." Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've done as a "learning experience." It makes me feel less stupid."

Experience

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P. J. O'Rourke
"Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper."

Family

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