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"It's wildly irritating to have invented something as revolutionary as sarcasm, only to have it abused by amateurs."
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"You are not my sunshine. Sorry. You're more like a gust of arctic wind that bursts in and blows out all the candles when the door cracks open."
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Personal Development
"Help me, I can't breathe, your ego is pushing all the air out of the room."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Are you driving this slow because you have no idea where we're going, or because you're hoping we jump out of the car & put ourselves out of our misery?"
Author Name
Personal Development
"Well, Faye, dear, I'm sure Harlow's sorry she didn't think to ask if you'd been eaten by a shark. That's totally on her."
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Personal Development
"You should always believe what you read in the newspapers, for that makes them more interesting."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Remember, I'm the only person her who's paid to be nice to you. But not too nice. Give me any lip and I'll break your face. OK?"
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Personal Development
"We are suffering from too much sarcasm."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Yeah, Hera was definitely channelling her inner Wicked Witch of the West that day."
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Personal Development
"Great! He has indigestion, so let's torture him with cake."
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Personal Development
"You are a sick, sick man, I told him."Thank you, Ben replied, looking modest."
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Personal Development
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"One day I was telling him that I thought that cars had replaced guns as phallic symbols for American men, and I thought it was interesting that he had one that was so small and fast. The next day he gave me the Datsun and went out and bought a Lincoln."
Masculinity
"The three jewels of Tao: compassion, moderation, and humility. Balthasar said compassion leads to courage, moderation leads to generosity, and humility leads to leadership."
Philosophy
"Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. There's no such place."
Satire
"Stephenie Meyer: Her vampires are sparkly, which I think we can all agree is wrong."
Critique
"It was the sound of a thousand hungry children crying, ten thousand widows tearing their hair over their husband's graves, a chorus of angels singing the last dirge on the day of God's death."
Suffering
"The prospect of change is a many-fanged beast, my dear."
Growth
"Science, you don't know, looks like magic."
Science
"Don't be so hard on yourself, You're doing the same thing, trying to reconcile all the moms that Mom ever was - The one you wanted, the one she was when you needed her and she was there, the one she was when she didn't understand. Most of us don't live our lives with one, integrated self that meets the world, we're a whole bunch of selves. When someone dies, they all integrate into the soul - the essence of who we are, beyond the different faces we wear throughout our lives. You're just hating the selves you've always hated, and loving the ones you've always loved. It's bound to mess you up."
Integration
"Sweet Pocket, you mustn't ask about my life before I came here. What I am now, I have always been, and everything I am is here with you."
"'Sweet Thalia,' said I. 'That is a fiery flagon of dragon toss.'"
Connection
"Turning your ankle hurts like hell, even if you're a superhero."
Reality
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