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Janet Evanovich

"You took your clothes off?''You didn't notice?''No! Jeez Louise, I don't even know you.''If you look under the covers, you'll know me better.''I don't want to know you better!''That's a big fib,' Diesel said."

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"You took your clothes off?''You didn't notice?''No! Jeez Louise, I don't even know you.''If you look under the covers, you'll know me better.''I don't want to know you better!''That's a big fib,' Diesel said."

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Amber Hurdle

"Don't panic. Are you sitting? You probably don't need to sit. Well, possibly. At least lean on something."

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"Ma'am,' Augustus said, nodding toward her, 'your daughter's car has just been deservedly egged by a blind man. Please close the door and go back inside or we'll be forced to call the police.' After wavering for a moment, Monica's mom closed the door and disappeared."

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Amber Hurdle

" Think of how many times you put on your underwear in a lifetime. It was appalling, it was disgusting, it was stupid."

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"Silverfish looked down."Oh. Are you a dwarf?"Cuddy gave him a blank stare."Are you a giant?" He said."Me? Of course not!"Ah. Then I must be a dwarf, yes."

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Amber Hurdle

"What's a philosopher?' said Brutha.Someone who's bright enough to find a job with no heavy lifting,' said a voice in his head."

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Amber Hurdle

"At this, Gansey rolled over onto his back and folded his hands on his chest. He wore a salmon polo shirt, which, in Blue's opinion, was far more hellish than anything they'd discussed to this point."

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Amber Hurdle

"Reason like a sphere? What type of reasoning does a wooden sphere do?""The circular type, I should think. And, by coincidence, it is my favorite type as well. Perhaps that's why I'm so good at the game."

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Amber Hurdle

"I liked that he was a tenured professor in the Department of Slightly Crooked Smiles with a dual appointments in the Department of Having a Voice that Made My Skin Feel More Like Skin."

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Amber Hurdle

"I guess when you turn off the main road, you have to be prepared to see some funny houses."

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Amber Hurdle

"What is it with you today? says Christina on the way to breakfast. Her eyes are stillswollen from sleep and her tangled hair forms a fuzzy halo around her face."Oh, you know, I say. "Sun shining. Birds chirping.She raises an eyebrow at me, as if reminding me that we are in an undergroundtunnel."

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Janet Evanovich
"I attributed the incidence to temporary insanity, and in my own defense, I'd like to say I haven't run over anyone since."
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Janet Evanovich
"The dog ran into the kitchen, stuck his nose in Grandma's crotch, and snuffled.Dang,' Grandma said. 'Guess my new perfume really works. I'm gonna have to try it out at the seniors meeting."
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Janet Evanovich
"Men drive off bridges and drink too much because of women like you."
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"I like the way you've let your hair go curly,' he finally said. 'Suits your personality. Lots of energy, not much control, sexy as hell,'Joe Morelli to Stephanie Plum."
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Janet Evanovich
"Aren't you something,' Grandma said. 'I never saw a midget up close.' 'Little person,' Briggs said. 'And I never saw anyone as old as you up close, either."
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Janet Evanovich
"On the bright side, I'm sure this isn't the last time you'll ever get firebombed, so maybe you'll have better luck next time."
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"I wasn't sure anymore what made a good marriage. There had to be love, of course, but there were so many different kinds of love. And clearly, some love was more enduring than others."
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"That's how you tell what a man's really made of. It's one thing for a man to be big and brave and kill a spider. Any man could do that. Trailin' after a woman when she's shopping for thongs and push-up bras is a whole other category of man. And then if you want to see how far you can go with it, you ask him to carry one of those little pink bags they give you."
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Janet Evanovich
"You never want to look in a mirror,' Lula said. 'Men love mirrors. They look at themselves doing the deed and they see Rex the Wonder Horse. Women look at themselves and think they need to renew their membership at the gym."
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Janet Evanovich
"If I gave you a pity position it wouldn't be in my office."
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