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"Creditor. One of a tribe of savages dwelling beyond the Financial Straits and dreaded for their desolating incursions."
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"You have to see every unit of currency that passes through your hands as a seed to your financial future."

"If we were not impressed by job titles, suits, and jargon, we would demand that financial advisors show us their personal bank statements before they tell us what we could or should do with our own money."
Explore more quotes by Ambrose Bierce

"Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of judges, advocates and jurors."

"Edible - good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm."

"Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others."

"Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in proportion to their readiness to doubt."

"Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white."

"Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable."

"Consul - in American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is given one by the Administration on condition that he leave the country."
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