top of page
.png){kind=small}
Exlpore more Comedy quotes
"Make it dark, make it grim, make it tough, but then, for the love of God, tell a joke."
"Uh-oh, I hope he doesn't start rattling off dirty limericks next; she'll probably burn the hotel down."
"Are you out of your goddamn mind? You think we can take on two hundred soldiers? I know I am an extremely attractive man, J, but I am not Bruce Lee."Who's Bruce Lee?"Who's Bruce Lee? Kenji asks, horrified. "Oh my God. We can't even be friends anymore."Why? Was he a friend of yours?"You know what, he says, "just stop. Just-I can't even talk to you right now."
"I had to stop myself from laughing. Who needs help taking a pill?"
"Sometimes Spiro missed the times when a troublesome worker was thrown out of a high window and that was the end of him. These days, if you threw someone out of a window, they'd phone their lawyer on the way down."
"My favorite laser disk ever was the laser disk for The Graduate, which had a commentary track that wasn't even the filmmakers, it was a professor, some film criticism guy who just happen to be this amazing commentator who went off into the whole theory of comedy."
Explore more quotes by Elayne Boosler
"You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little potbelly and a bald spot."
"The Vatican is against surrogate mothers. Good thing they didn't have that rule when Jesus was born."
"My ancestors wandered lost in the wilderness for forty years because even in biblical times, men would not stop to ask for directions."
"I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something's wrong with me."
"When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking."
bottom of page