"You know you're old if your walker has an airbag."

Old,

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"You know you're old if your walker has an airbag."

Exlpore more Old quotes

"I'm too old to adapt to somebody else's ways."

Claudia Christian, American Actress

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"If we all knew we were going to live to be 150 years old, we'd all approach our lives very differently."

Eric Bogosian, American Actor

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"It is better to be young in your failures than old in your successes."

Flannery O'Connor, American Author

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"You can always tell an old soldier by the inside of his holsters and cartridge boxes. The young ones carry pistols and cartridges; the old ones, grub."

George Bernard Shaw, Irish Dramatist

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"That's me: an old kazoo with some sparklers."

Bette Davis, American Actress

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"I've been doing theatre since I was 5 years old."

Claudia Christian, American Actress

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"In that, Blade 2 is very much like a rock concert... if it's too loud, you're too old."

Guillermo del Toro, Mexican Director

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"Old foxes want no tutors."

Thomas Fuller, English Clergyman

Old, Want

"A new philosophy generally means in practice the praise of some old vice."

Gilbert K. Chesterton, English Writer

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"To be honest, I look at my Pinball program and feel that it is old stuff. I could do much better."

Bill Budge, American Businessman

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Explore more quotes by Phyllis Diller

"If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like."

Baseball

"You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type."

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"My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor."

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"Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing."

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"Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves."

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"It's a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or I'd be rotten to the core."

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"What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day."

Christmas

"Our dog died from licking our wedding picture."

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"I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them."

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"Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed."

Time