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Robert Orben

"Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?"

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"Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?"

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Donna Grant

"Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?"

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"The Iraqi elections were an important first step."

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"I am planning to return and contest the October elections in Pakistan."

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"I am constitutionally competent to contest the elections."

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"The labour Party has lost the last four elections. If they lose another, they get to keep the liberal party."

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"In New York, we had primary elections for mayor. To improve their chances, all five candidates changed their name to Rudy Giuliani."

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"I know that elections must be limited only to those who understand that the Arabs are the deadly enemy of the Jewish state, who would bring on us a slow Auschwitz - not with gas, but with knives and hatchets."

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"I think the Democratic Party realizes, having lost two presidential elections, we need to do a better job of creating a farm team."

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"Do not seek to find a reason why elections are not possible. Seek to make them possible, and they will be possible."

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"The candidate out front on Labor Day has historically been the one who stayed ahead in November."

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Robert Orben
"To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so."
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Robert Orben
"Quit worrying about your health. It will go away."
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Robert Orben
"Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that's not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral."
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Robert Orben
"Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?"
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Robert Orben
"In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative; fight, flee - or laugh."
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Robert Orben
"I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself."
Day,
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Robert Orben
"With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they'd bust it to Corporal!"
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Robert Orben
"If you can laugh together, you can work together."
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Robert Orben
"Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian."
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Robert Orben
"Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected."
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