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"Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five."
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"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"
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Personal Development
"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."
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Personal Development
"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."
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Personal Development
"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"
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Personal Development
"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."
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Personal Development
"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."
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Personal Development
"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."
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Personal Development
"She breathed an enormous sigh, looked at Poirot, Looked away, and suddenly blurted out, "You're too old. Nobody told me you were so old. I really don't want to be rude but - there it is. You're too old. I'm really sorry." She turned abruptly and blundered out of the room, rather like a desperate moth in lamplight. Poirot, his mouth open, heard the bang of the front door. He ejaculated: "Non d'un nom d'un nom..."
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Personal Development
"I was my own boss, but that all changed the day I got married."
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Personal Development
"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"
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Personal Development
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"Inspiration arrives as a packet of material to be delivered."
Inspirational
"The inner spaces that a good story lets us enter are the old apartments of religion."
Religion
"A leader is one who, out of madness or goodness, volunteers to take upon himself the woe of the people. There are few men so foolish, hence the erratic quality of leadership in the world."
Leadership
"A narrative is like a room on whose walls a number of false doors have been painted; while within the narrative, we have many apparent choices of exit, but when the author leads us to one particular door, we know it is the right one because it opens."
Choice
"Customs and convictions change; respectable people are the last to know, or to admit, the change, and the ones most offended by fresh reflections of the facts in the mirror of art."
Art
"What art offers is space - a certain breathing room for the spirit."
Art
"But for a few phrases from his letters and an odd line or two of his verse, the poet walks gagged through his own biography."
Writing
"The first breath of adultery is the freest; after it, constraints aping marriage develop."
Marriage
"Every marriage tends to consist of an aristocrat and a peasant. Of a teacher and a learner."
Marriage
"America is a vast conspiracy to make you happy."
Society
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