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"He's a guy. We're easy and stupid. Just go bat your eyes at him and beg for forgiveness. It'll take five minutes, three if you wear something low-cut."
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"Marriage is a sacred-commitment."
"A woman dictates before marriage in order that she may have an appetite for submission afterwards."
"We are all connected in spirit, in love and in faith."
"Parent greatest gift to their children is their bond of love."
"It was too perfect to last,' so I am tempted to say of our marriage. But it can be meant in two ways. It may be grimly pessimistic - as if God no sooner saw two of His creatures happy than He stopped it ('None of that here!'). As if He were like the Hostess at the sherry-party who separates two guests the moment they show signs of having got into a real conversation. But it could also mean 'This had reached its proper perfection. This had become what it had in it to be. Therefore of course it would not be prolonged.' As if God said, 'Good; you have mastered that exercise. I am very pleased with it. And now you are ready to go on to the next."
"Those who don't care about the positive side of you, are too dangerous to have on your side."
"They said, "You'll never find someone like me again!" I thanked them for wishing me well."
"In some cases, it is the woman's stomach-not her heart-that has left her man for another."
"Try not to be the kind of friend who only makes friends when in desperate need of financial help."
"The key to every human heart is love."
Explore more quotes by Elle Lothlorien
"Don't take this the wrong way, but Australians have a LOT of bitches on their cashola."
"I'm almost afraid to tell you. Let's put it this way: clean toilets are the least of your problems in this country."
"Turns out rolling your eyes in a bar when 'Land Down Under' plays is like someone belching during the Star Spangled Banner in America."
"Once the principals in their party are seated, with those lower on the totem pole left to grumble and move on to find another table, our once-cozy booth transforms into a damp fusion of vacuous wretchedness, with the three women all complaining alternately about their wet hair/clothes and their respective distance from Talon, while the man himself is trying to maneuver his Paul Bunyan frame way too close to me."
"How do you tactfully spin the term "man-whore to someone's sister?"
"I try not to laugh too loud, afraid a bark-like noise will be mistaken by any great whites lurking in the area as the distress call of a juvenile seal."
"I don't think Australians ever use a couple of words when twenty will do just fine."
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