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"The difference between tragedy and comedy: Tragedy is something awful happening to somebody else, while comedy is something awful happening to somebody else."
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"Make it dark, make it grim, make it tough, but then, for the love of God, tell a joke."
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"I hate comedy... Yo...-yo bitch."
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Personal Development
"It's always been said that comedy comes mostly out of the dark side anyway."
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Personal Development
"I never watch comedies they suck if something sucks it sucks there isn't doubt about it."
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"Have a chocolate-covered raisin, he said."They look like rat droppings, said the Chair.The Dean peered at them in the gloom."So that's it, he said. "The bag fell on the floor a minute ago, and I thought there seemed rather a lot."
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"I'd like to come back because I really miss doing situation comedy."
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"There's a lot of comedy in Intermission but it's got this depth. It's not comedy for comedy's sake - it's informed by something else. I like stuff like that."
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"Uh-oh, I hope he doesn't start rattling off dirty limericks next; she'll probably burn the hotel down."
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"Are you out of your goddamn mind? You think we can take on two hundred soldiers? I know I am an extremely attractive man, J, but I am not Bruce Lee."Who's Bruce Lee?"Who's Bruce Lee? Kenji asks, horrified. "Oh my God. We can't even be friends anymore."Why? Was he a friend of yours?"You know what, he says, "just stop. Just-I can't even talk to you right now."
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Personal Development
"I think a lot of the instincts you have doing comedy are really the same for doing drama, in that it's essentially about listening. The way I approach comedy, is you have to commit to everything as if it's a dramatic role, meaning you play it straight."
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"The way to a man's heart is through his chest."
Heart
"If you hack the Vatican server, have you tampered in God's domain?"
God
"Feminism is sort of like God. Many people profess to believe in it, but no one seems to be able to define it to everyone's satisfaction."
God
"Lawyers are the first refuge of the incompetent."
Lawyers
"Life is like an analogy."
Life
"There are two types of people in the world, and I'm one of them."
People
"This would not be a problem if I were driving a snowplow."
Driving
"I'm content to stand on tradition. I'm even more content to wipe my feet on it."
Content
"Where can I get some tat? I'd like to trade it in."
Tat
"The principle of Sturgeon's Razor states that the simplest answer to any problem is 90% crap."
Principle
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