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"I play against a front and a back every night, Ming does not have to do that, Duncan does not have to do that, Garnett doesn't do that. I am the only one that has to do that."
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"The night I announced I was getting married, Daddy paced for hours on the porch."

"Yeah, I was a local hero. It was great for me, 'cos I had a full house every night all night seven nights a week for five years that I played. The next five years I just played five days a week, but I still had a full house every night."

"The Detroit String Quartet played Brahms last night. Brahms lost."

"Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive."

"The cries of the sufferers on the remaining part of the wreck were heard during the night."

"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
Explore more quotes by Shaquille O'Neal


"I play against a front and a back every night, Ming does not have to do that, Duncan does not have to do that, Garnett doesn't do that. I am the only one that has to do that."


"I put a lot into it, and when I am done playing, I plan on going undercover and then being the sheriff or chief of police somewhere, either Miami or Orlando, I don't know yet."


"I had an awful first quarter but I picked it up. To all you single guys out there, it's not how you start the date, it's how you finish it sir. A lot of people can, you know, start the date with flowers and candy, but if you don't finish the date - you know what I mean?"


"This is a tough game. There are times when you've got to play hurt, when you've got to block out the pain."


"But that is the only thing that slows me down is the system. No one, two or three was big enough to slow me down, only the system. It was the system that slowed me down to make my numbers fall. Not because I am older."


"I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok."


"Everything happens for a reason. I'm used to it, I prepare for it. Like I say, at the end of the day, those in charge of their own destiny are going to do what's rights for them and their family."


"We're just going to come out and play. We know that we're supposed to win all the games, but if we don't, we just have to take the next game and focus on what we did wrong in the game before and just try to do better at the next game."
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