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"Our dog died from licking our wedding picture."
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"Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle - keep away from children."
Work
"My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual."
Anger
"A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once."
Mistake
"Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight."
Bed
"My photographs don't do me justice - they just look like me."
Justice
"You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type."
Blood
"If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like."
Baseball
"The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing."
Reason
"The real reason your pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing at you."
Reason
"You know you're old if your walker has an airbag."
Old
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"I want the big drama. I always said I don't want a wedding I want a parade."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Monica Seles: I'd hate to be next door to her on her wedding night."
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Personal Development
"I sang a song at my sister's wedding. My mother forced me into that, too. But that one felt all right."
Author Name
Personal Development
"A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers."
Author Name
Personal Development
"You may invite the entire 35th Division to your wedding if you want to. I guess it's going to be yours as well as mine. We might as well have the church full while we are at it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"When Andrew went with the girls, we were talking all morning and he was saying, 'It's okay. Just remember we had such a good day. Our wedding was so perfect.' Because we're such a unit together. He made me feel very part of the day on April the 29th."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I really did put up all my wedding pictures on my website. And I swear to you, my wedding pictures got downloaded just as much as my bikini pictures."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Well... Actually I got picked because I was the only one who fit the wedding gown - they had my size."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I was a bridesmaid at a wedding in one picture."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My husband, Jim, converted to Judaism just before our wedding."
Author Name
Personal Development
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